MESSAGE 1
Unfortunately, the $noun$ is built very firmly into the wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 2
The $noun$ is firmly attached to the wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 3
I'm sorry, but you can't do that. It's an immovable object, and you hardly rate
as an irresistible force.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 4
The $noun$ $n_is$ far to heavy to be carried.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 5
Don't be silly! You can't take the $noun$!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 6
The $noun$ $n_is$ not the kind of thing you can carry, I'm afraid.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 7
It's not worth the bother, honestly.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 8
That would be an environmentally destructive act, and as such, I'm not going to
let you do it. So there.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 9
The $adjective$ $noun$ is attached to the roof, and refuses to come loose.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 10
I'm not so sure that would be in your best interests. The $noun$ might
take exception to being treated like that.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 11
It belongs to the Tinman, and you can't have it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 12
Even if you could, taking that would seriously undermine the structural
stability of this room, and it might collapse, burying you in tons of rubble.
So how about we just leave it where it is, okay?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 13
Taken.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 14
portable hole: the hole is special. If you want it, you'll have to ask for it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 15
The fish are sealed inside the glass tank, so you can't get at them. You don't
have the facilities for transporting live fish, so it's probably a good thing.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 16
You get out of the pool and dry yourself off.

END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 17
You take everything out of the $object$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 18
You take everything out of the chest.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 19
You can't take the sphere from here. It's hanging just out of reach.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 20
The string that attaches the sphere to the roof refuses to break. No matter how
hard you pull, it won't come loose.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 21
You can't take the stool while you're standing on it! It's a physical
impossibility! It's like trying to lift yourself up by your shoelaces!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 22
large painting: it's stuck to the wall, and you can't get it off.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 23
hard bench: why would you want to?!
warning sign: don't be a vandal.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 24
whole ocean: not today... not any day...
sandy beach: leave it for other people to enjoy, okay?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 25
golden door: try as you might, you can't remove it from the wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 26
white sphere: you can't. It's attached to the roof by a tough string.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 27
huge trees: you'd just sling one over each shoulder, I suppose?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 28
Silver Guardsman: instant hospitalization...
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 29
very large stool: you're still standing on it, silly!
You can't reach anything else while you are on the stool.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 30
Your ranking is Utterly Hopeless, Why Are We Wasting Our Time?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 31
Your ranking is Pickpocket.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 32
Your ranking is Apprentice Bandit.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 33
Your ranking is Skilled Burglar.
END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 34
Your ranking is Real Estate Agent.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 35
Your ranking is Master Thief.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 36

Fine then, stop playing. Turn me off, even. See if I care.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 37

A wise choice indeed.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 38
You can't reach the $noun$ from your position on the stool.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 39
The hole peels off the wall with a quiet slurping noise.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 40
With a wet, sticky sound, the hole peels off the wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 41
You get your fingers under the edge of the portable hole and peel it off the
wall. It comes free with a sound like soapy bathwater being drained.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 42
As you remove the hole, the exit it had created in the wall vanishes.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 43
Balancing precariously on the stool, you reach up and take the portable hole
off the roof. There is a loud noise like a gumboot being pulled out of a mud
patch, and the hole comes free.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 44
You can't reach the hole from where you are.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 45
You peel the hole carefully off the floor, and the exit vanishes.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 46
If you take the portable hole off the cloud, how are you going to get it back
on again? I suggest you leave it right where it is.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 47
You grab the edge of the hole and try to peel it off the sky, but it seems
reluctant to come loose. You pull harder, and, with a sound like an entire
fleet of bathtubs being emptied at once, the portable hole comes free from its
place in mid air. The exit it was holding open vanishes instantly. You stumble,
off balance, and the hole slips from your fingers. It falls to the ground,
where it quickly melts into nothing more than a sticky black puddle.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 48
You'll have to remove the $noun$ first.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 49
Dropped.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 50
Clothing is a very important matter. Be specific about what you want to $verb$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 51
Your vision seems to sparkle for an instant as you put on the eyeglasses.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 52
A small golden door becomes visible in the north wall. You couldn't see it
previously, but these delicate gold spectacles must have abilities far beyond
those of ordinary delicate gold spectacles.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 53
As you take off the gold eyeglasses your vision returns to normal.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 54
You can now see the small golden door in the north wall. It's open at the
moment, due to your earlier efforts, revealing a solid brick wall beyond.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 55
Attached to the brick wall is your portable hole.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 56
You are no longer wearing the $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 57
That'd be messy.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 58
You aren't wearing that!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 59
Nothing happens. There's no charge left, I guess.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 60
The mystery object emits a high-pitched hum, and all around you the air begins
to sparkle with colour. Then, inexplicably, the device makes a "fzzkt" sound
and the colours fade. Nothing has happened.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 61
With every muscle straining, you manage to move the seat a short way to the
side, scratching the floor as you do. Behind the seat is a large opening,
leading north. (By the way, your arms hurt.)
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 62
You give the pile of clothes a tentative prod, and it moves a little to the
side. Underneath is a small pot of quite disgusting purple cream. Who'd have
guessed the Witch was into cosmetics? It sure didn't look like it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 63
The arm begins to move, jerking this way and that. There is a steadily growing
hum coming from deep inside the machine, and the pointed laser-bit on the end
of the arm begins to glow yellow. Then, without warning, it points directly at
you and a beam of bright yellow light lances out and strikes you. Satisfied
that it has made its point, the machine falls quiet.

The room appears to be growing smaller.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 64
The arm starts to move, swaying this way and that. From deep inside the machine
there comes a growing hum, and the pointy laser-nozzle thing on the end of the
arm begins to glow yellow. Then, without warning, it points directly at you,
and a beam of bright yellow light lances out and strikes you. Satisfied that it
has made its point, the machine falls quiet.

The room appears to be growing larger.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 65
Brief mode.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 66
Verbose mode.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 67

After all the effort that went into these descriptions, you want to turn them
off?! You could have vivid descriptions, moving prose, and instead you're going
to be satisfied with just the title? Some people! Sheesh!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 68
Which chest? Try again, and tell me the name on the chest, this time!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 69
There's no time for relaxing! You have to get out of here!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 70
There's nobody home.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 71
It's a bit late for that. Your surroundings continue to shrink (or perhaps
you're getting bigger), steadily and inexorably, and soon you are very
uncomfortable, squashed against the roof. The change of scale goes on around
you, but unfortunately, there isn't enough space in here for you any more.
What a way to go.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Humiliating To Mention In Public.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 72
Pay attention! The room continues to grow smoothly in size (or are you
shrinking?) until it is difficult to make out the roof any longer. The walls
seem a huge distance away. Finally, the change comes to a halt. Things look
totally different from down here. Unfortunately, whatever you were carrying
didn't shrink along with you.

You're now an inch tall.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 73
Without warning, you begin to get taller again. The room seems to be shrinking
smoothly back to its usual size around you, and in seconds you have returned to
your normal height. What a relief!

You're no longer an inch tall.

END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 74
I'm not taking orders from a pipsqueak like you.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 75
Don't order me around, shrimp.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 76
No way, tiny. Do it yourself.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 77
I'm not going to listen to a little squirt like you.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 78
Who are you to boss me around, pipsqueak?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 79
You're so small, you get only one word commands. Like it or lump it, pee wee.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 80
I don't know if you recall, but I think I mentioned earlier that this room is
totally sealed. Which means that air can't get in. You have just used up the
available supply, and since you are naturally rather fond of breathing, you are
quite unhappy about this turn of events. You make a few rasping noises in
protest and clutch at your throat for a while, just like in the movies, before
collapsing to the floor. Needless to say...

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is A Lovely Shade Of Blue.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 81
The white sphere suddenly gives off an incredibly bright flash of light. The
black void surrounding and restraining you is unable to stand up to the
intensity of the magical burst, and instantly evaporates. With nothing to
support you any longer, you fall to the floor of your former prison with a
thud and an interesting "ooff" noise.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 82
Suddenly there is an incredibly bright flash of light from the sphere. You are
blinded instantly. I guess there wasn't enough darkness around for the magical
light to dispel. That was pretty careless of you.

               **** You are blind (and I don't mean drunk!) ****


Your ranking is Blundering Fool.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 83
At that moment, the ornate mirror stops reflecting and turns completely black.
There is a sudden gale-force wind, pulling you toward the stone cube, and you
are sucked through the surface of the mirror.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 84
There is an incredibly bright flash of light from the sphere. You are blinded
instantly. I guess there wasn't enough darkness around for the magical light to
dispel. Then the opal ring on your finger glows a soft blue (or it would, if
you could see it) and gives you a second chance. Your sight is restored.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 85
It seems to be getting hard to breathe in here. You are near the point of
collapse when your opal ring glows a soft blue, giving you a second chance, and
you can once again breathe easily. I'd get out of here, if I were you, before
the effect wears off.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 86
Too late! The room continues to shrink around you until your head is squashed
up against the roof. Just as you are about to run out of space, the opal ring
on your finger glows a soft blue, giving you a second chance, and you begin to
shrink again. Soon the room is back to its normal size. Whew!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 87
You step toward the painting, and get flung violently back again. There seems
to be some basic incompatibility between the workings of the painting and those
of the portable hole. Different brand name, or something. I'm really sorry
about that, but you know how it is with these magical transporters. If it's not
one thing, it's another.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 88
You step into the painting, passing through the surface of the canvas as if it
were fluid, and find yourself in the middle of the scene it depicted.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 89
You step into the painting, passing through the surface of the canvas as if it
were fluid, and find yourself in the middle of the scene it depicted.

The Night Sky
You have just emerged into empty space some distance above a planet. I won't
lower the standards of the game by describing death due to decompression in
great detail; suffice it to say:

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Null And Void.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 90
You try to step through the painting but your opal rings glows a soft blue and
magically restrains you, giving you a second chance. It seems that certain
death lies on the other side.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 91
The tornado roars in, picking up the house, the barn, even the gate that was
supposed to stay shut (darn it!). Everything is swept up by the fury of the
twister. You spin in the air, faster and faster, and finally faint with
dizziness. When you awaken, you find yourself in a bright, Technicolor land.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 92
The wind picks up suddenly; the tornado is coming back! It whirls in, picking
up most of the wreckage, and you along with it. Again you faint with dizziness,
and again you awake to find that your surroundings are completely different.
The tornado is a fairly predictable one: you are back on the Yellow Brick Road.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 93
The hole begins to cringe as you bring it close to the door. It wriggles and
writhes in your hand, before finally curling up into a ball and refusing to
come out until you take it away. It uncurls again when it feels it is a safe
distance from the door, but it won't attach itself there for you or anybody.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 94
You apply the portable hole to the blank brick wall inside the door frame, and,
with a loud "pop", it creates an exit in the north wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 95
With a soft "pop", the portable hole creates an exit in the wall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 96
An exit to the next room is opened with a soft "pop".
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 97
The portable hole connects to the next room with a barely audible "pop".
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 98
The portable hole refuses to stick to the wall, and slides to the floor in a
heap, where you retrieve it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 99
You attempt to apply the portable hole to the wall, but it refuses to stick,
and you soon stop trying.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 100
The hole refuses to attach itself on the wall. It keeps sliding to the ground
in a forlorn little heap. You finally give up and retrieve it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 101
Sticking the portable hole there would be a waste of effort, since that wall
has a doorway already.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 102
You stretch up and apply the portable hole to the ceiling. It makes a sound
like a champagne bottle being opened as it connects to whatever is above.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 103
Even standing on the stool, the roof is too high for you to reach. You stretch
to your limit, almost falling off the stool several times, but you can't attach
the portable hole to the ceiling.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 104
The roof is too high for you to be able to stick the hole there. You simply
cannot reach. You try throwing the hole up at the roof like a pancake, but it
doesn't stick.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 105
You place the portable hole carefully on the ground, and hear a "pop" as it
connects to whatever is below.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 106
The portable hole will only stick to the interior of a room (ie. the walls, the
floor, the ceiling). They're very temperamental, these portable holes.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 107
You're not carrying the portable hole, so you can't put it anywhere.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 108
You slide the crank into the slot next to the door and it begins to turn, all
by itself. The door rises rapidly in its grooves, and soon it has retracted
entirely into the ceiling. The crank falls out of the slot when it's finished.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 109
The hand crank spins furiously and the door slides down out of the roof. It
soon resumes its original position, blocking the archway. When the crank has
finished turning it ejects itself from the slot and falls to the floor.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 110
There is a clank from inside the mechanism as the coin slips into the slot. You
push against the bars, which now rotate freely, and step through.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 111
Hesitantly, you push the amulet into the indentation on the small golden door.
It fits perfectly, meshing with the surface so well that it becomes totally
indistinguishable from the door itself. There is a click, and the door pops
slightly ajar. You pull it all the way open to reveal.... a brick wall. A
solid, blank, brick wall, with no way through. All this effort for a brick
wall. What a shame! It led you a merry chase, though, didn't it? From Hell to
Oz and back again. What more could you ask for in a game? Of course, you still
have to get out of this place. There has to be a way.... right?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 112
Unfortunately, arcane miracle though it is, the portable hole isn't large
enough to accommodate the very large stool you're carrying. You can't climb
through the hole while you have it. Sorry for the inconvenience.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 113
You attempt to climb into the next room. However, squeezing through a 2 foot
hole whilst carrying one of the more deadly weapons known to man is not a
bright move. One slip and you're gone. Unfortunately you slip, several times,
and there's nobody around to pick up the pieces. Whoops.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Withheld By Request.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 114
As you move, the lightsabre makes its characteristic "zzzshuuww" noise.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 115
Just as you're leaving, the Scarecrow jumps down from his pole and shouts,
 "Hey, wait a minute! Aren't you supposed to take me to the Emerald City to
get some brains? Isn't that how it goes? Hey, wait up!" He runs after you.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 116
As you walk away, the Tinman suddenly starts to move.
 "Ha ha!" he says. "I was only fooling! I'm going with you to the Emerald City,
to ask for a heart." He picks up his oil can and follows you through the trees.
Great. Another loony tune added to your entourage.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 117





As you walk off, the Cowardly Lion stumbles meekly after you, mumbling
something about wanting some courage, but always being too scared to do
anything about it.
Just as the four of you set out toward the Emerald City, a dark shadow sweeps
across the sun. A swarm of winged monkeys swoops from the sky, lifting you and
your companions. You consider struggling, but it would defeat the purpose if
you actually managed to escape while you were still 200 feet above the ground.
Soon you are heading toward the bleak castle you saw to the west. When you
finally arrive, after hours in the air, your companions are flown into the
castle through a lower window, while you are taken less-than-gently to the top
of the castle's tower, to be horribly tortured by the Wicked Witch of the West,
I expect.

You are thrust through the only window of the tower. The monkey who carried you
all this way gives you a wink and flaps off.


END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 118
You are interrupted by a sudden cry from below. The Scarecrow is screaming in
terror as his straw stuffing is pulled out by the Witch's assistants and used
to start a barbecue. You stand frozen by the horror of what you are hearing as
the Scarecrow gives his all to cook fifteen sausages and a nice piece of fillet
steak. The Wicked Witch begins cackling uncontrollably.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 119
Again you are interrupted by the sound of screaming from below. The Witch's
assistants are picking on the Tinman this time. He is being used to make the
tin coating on a batch of soup cans, electroplating the plain steel. Inch by
agonising inch the Tinman is eaten away, and you can only stand by, listening
helplessly. The Witch, meanwhile, is having another laughing fit.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 120
This time it is the roars of the Cowardly Lion that stop you in mid-action. The
poor creature dies of heart failure as he is strapped down and forced to watch
an entire late night horror movie marathon. The Wicked Witch finds the whole
thing incredibly amusing, and almost ends up rolling on the floor.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 121
The Wicked Witch yawns loudly at this point, displaying teeth that would give
the most hardened dentist nightmares.
 "I'm beginning to tire of this," she says in a bored voice. "Adventurers are
no fun these days. No imagination at all. Get out of here." She waves her hands
in the air, tracing complex patterns, and the castle starts to fade around you.
It is replaced by another room which becomes increasingly solid until the
Witch's depressing home is gone altogether.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 122
You won't need that direction here.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 123
The Silver Guardsman remains motionless as you pass by.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 124
The Silver Guardsman seems a little surprised to see you walking out of the
room it's supposed to be guarding. It becomes very annoyed that you outwitted
it, and with an incredible burst of speed, rushes toward you. Just as it is
about to strike a killing (and rather painful) blow, your opal ring glows blue,
giving you a second chance, and whisks you out of harm's way.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 125
The Silver Guardsman seems a little surprised to see you walking out of the
room it's supposed to be guarding. It becomes very annoyed that you outwitted
it, and with an incredible burst of speed, rushes toward you. What with it
being seven feet tall and built like any three Mr Universes put together, you
don't stand a chance.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Not Measurable.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 126
You climb carefully down onto the rails. Suddenly there is a blinding light
from the northern section of the tunnel, and a freight train rockets out. Your
opal ring glows blue at this point, giving you a second chance, and the train
miraculously stops, just in time to avoid spoiling its paintwork. The driver
proceeds to poke his head out the window and hurl abuse at you in three
languages. Shaken by your brush with death (not to mention the train driver),
you leave the station quickly, vowing to take the bus from now on.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 127
You climb carefully down onto the rails. Suddenly there is a blinding light
from the northern section of the tunnel, and a freight train rockets out. The
train driver makes three seconds of frantic "get-out-of-the-way" motions before
he actually runs you over. At least he tried. You, on the other hand, just
stood there. Now you might be able to see why they ask you to stay off the
track. You've just given that poor train driver a guilt-complex for life, and
the Railway really hates paying for therapy. As for you... well, it should be
fairly obvious.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Not Worth The Paper It Isn't Printed On.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 128
As you move past the Guardsman, it reaches out, blindingly fast, and grabs you
by the throat. It picks you up, walks to the other side of the room, and throws
you through the east doorway, into the kitchen. I think you annoyed it. You are
left sprawled on the ground beside the sink, gasping, while the Silver
Guardsman resumes its post at the door.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 129
The chute is far too small for you to be able to squeeze into. You'd have to be
pretty silly to want to go up there anyway. You could get hit in the face by a
load of dirty laundry at any moment!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 130
You can't go up.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 131
You propose to fly, perhaps?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 132
Carefully avoiding splinters, you climb down from the stool.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 133
You're in Hell. How much lower do you think you can get?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 134
You can't go down.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 135
You are now on the very large stool, for whatever good it does you.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 136
I think you should seriously consider putting it down first.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 137
Not while you're on this stool, you don't!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 138
You throw the bucket of water over the Witch, and she screams out in pain.
 "Oh, no, you've seen the movie! Noooo! Help me. I'm melting. I'm melting.
Aah! Oh you wicked person! I'm mlmmmfmmmg. mmmmm mlll...." The Wicked Witch of
the West dissolves almost completely away, leaving behind only a brown puddle
on the floor, and some very ugly clothes.

Now, I'd like to make it clear that you really didn't have to kill the Witch at
this point. Had you left her alone, she would have become bored and sent you
away, and you could have kept your nice bucket full of water. Oh well.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 139
You throw the bucket of water over the Witch, and she screams out in pain.
 "Oh, no, you've seen the movie! Noooo! Help me. I'm melting. I'm melting.
Aah! Oh you wicked person! I'm mlmmmfmmmg. mmmmm mlll...." The Wicked Witch of
the West dissolves almost completely away, leaving behind only a brown puddle
on the floor, and some very ugly clothes.

It was a good thing you killed the Witch when you did. She was getting set to
turn you into something horrid, just as you drenched her. You were very lucky.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 140
Click.

The ruby slippers sparkle even more brightly for a moment, and the world starts
to spin around you. Everything becomes a whirl: colours and shapes blur
together. Eventually the spinning stops, and you manage to catch your breath.
You're back in Kansas. And now there's no tornado damage at all! Astonishing!
These shoes are a great find.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 141
Click. Nothing happens.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 142
Click.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 143
The $noun$ $n_is$ not the kind of thing you can use for clicking.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 144
The Wicked Witch rudely interrupts.
 "Don't I know you from somewhere?" she says in a voice that reminds you of
fingernails on a blackboard. "Yes, I remember now. You were that boring one
from earlier. And you're back again so soon? I must do something about that."
The Wicked Witch begins flipping rapidly through her book of spells. Suddenly
she stops flipping and starts cackling. This is not a good sign.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 145
Before you can do anything, the Witch throws a cloud of orange dust at you, and
mumbles a few magic words. You feel yourself being transformed, like many
before you. Suddenly, your opal ring glows a soft blue, giving you a second
chance, and the transformation reverses. The Wicked Witch howls with rage, and tries another spell, then another, but they too have no effect. Finally she
settles for transporting you away, just to get you out of her hair. There is a
swirl of colour, and you find yourself in another room.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 146
Before you can do anything, the Witch throws a cloud of orange dust at you, and
mumbles a few magic words. You feel yourself being transformed, like many
before you. You shrink, your head becomes dome shaped, and your arms and legs
disappear. You have been changed into a small blue toadstool, growing out of
the wall underneath the window. The Wicked Witch cackles with glee.
 "At least now you're more of a fun guy," she shrieks happily.

                 **** You have died (or close enough) ****


Your ranking is Small And Blue.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 147
I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'd just like to let you know at this point that
these small crimson fish are actually red herrings.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 148
The plant moves its pod slightly to one side, and regards you for a moment.
 "Guy sure looks like plant food to me," it says in a deep, menacing voice.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 149
Suddenly, the plant reaches out with its hundreds of runners and grabs you.
It is about to push you right into its gaping mouth, to be chewed up into lots
of little tiny bits (sounds like fun, huh?), when your opal ring glows a soft
blue, giving you a second chance, and you become momentarily intangible. The
runners go straight through you, and you take advantage of the plant's
confusion to escape via the door to the north.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 150
Suddenly, the plant reaches out with its hundreds of runners and grabs you.
There's no time to struggle as you are pulled closer and closer to the plant's
gaping mouth, with its rows of razor sharp teeth. This is really an interesting
role reversal: the plant eating the person, instead of the other way around. Of
course, you're in no position to appreciate the irony.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Liquid Fertilizer.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 151
I hate to interrupt whatever you're doing, but this is important. You remember
how you left your portable hole hanging in the sky? Well it's been wilting in
the heat, and it just gave up the ghost. It flops out of the sky, closing off
the passage it formed, and begins to melt. Soon it is nothing more than a black
puddle, trickling across the ground. You have a problem. In fact, Noah had
fewer problems than you do now, and think of the mess he had to clean up.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 152
The puddle is absolutely without function, so why bother with it?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 153
You throw the $noun$ at the Silver Guardsman. It bounces. Great.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 154
You $verb$ the $noun$ and it vanishes into the void.
END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 155
You throw your chosen weapon at the Wicked Witch with all your might. She waves
her little finger, and it changes course. The last you see of your precious
$noun$, it's sailing out the window. Bye bye, $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 156
You push the (on) stud, and, with a hum of ionizing air, a three foot blue beam
leaps from one end of the lightsabre to form the blade. You wave it around
(rather carelessly, I might add), and it makes a "vvvshuuww" noise as it
scythes through the air.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 157
The lightsabre is already turned on. If you're going to play with this thing,
you should at least be able to tell the difference. Honestly!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 158
Once you press the (off) stud, the glowing blue blade winks off with a "zzhiip"
noise, leaving a plain (though much safer) metal cylinder.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 159
The lightsabre isn't turned on at this time.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 160
I don't see what you're referring to.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 161
The wall is blank. There doesn't seem to be anything unusual about it, except
when you look at it just out of the corner of your eye. Then you can catch just
a tiny glimpse of something. How peculiar.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 162
The pot is made of some kind of ceramic, and is filled with a greasy purple
substance. It has a rectangular label stuck to the side, and there's no lid.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 163
There is definitely less ointment in the pot than there was before, but I think
there's enough left for a few more vanishings yet.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 164
You hurt your face in the attempt.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 165
Suicide is not the answer, but it's your game, not mine.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 166
The characters in this game are all above bribery. Besides, nobody's going to
be interested in anything you have.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 167
You could climb the trees, I suppose, but you'd find that there was nothing up
there. Just a trunk, and branches, and leaves and all those other tree things.
And then you'd get angry, because I let you climb the trees and there was
nothing there to do. And you'd probably end up taking it out on me, and I
really don't need the stress. So I'm not going to let you climb the trees. It's
the best thing for everybody, really.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 168
There are a number of creatures that appear graceful whilst they are leaping
around. You are not one of them.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 169
You jump. Watch your blood pressure, now. If this level of excitement keeps up,
you could have a heart attack.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 170
Boing! Boing! You begin leaping maniacally around, rattling whatever it is that
you keep between your ears.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 171
The $noun$ sails gracefully through the window and hits the ground.
Eventually.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 172
You don't have the $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 173
Thrown.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 174
Obvious directions: .... you're in a void .... direction has no meaning ....
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 175
Your fingers are already YOURS. They go where you go. You don't need to $verb$
them, because it's only stealing from yourself.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 176
The correct wording is RUB <object> WITH CREAM. See if you can get it right,
please. This sort of thing is important in adventure games.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 177
Suddenly it seems to come alive, making several quick darting movements around
the room, before finally vanishing in a puff of white smoke. The smoke drifts
into a vague "N" shape before it disperses. The $noun$ is gone.
END_MESSAGE


MESSAGE 178
A single daub of cream and it starts to caper around the room. You watch in
amazement as a previously inanimate object takes an exaggerated run-up, leaps
dramatically off the ground, and vanishes suddenly in mid air. Only a few wisps of white smoke, in a hazy "E" shape, mark the departure of the $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 179
Suddenly it seems to come alive, making several quick darting movements around
the room, before finally vanishing in a puff of white smoke. The smoke drifts
into a vague "S" shape before it disperses. The $noun$ is gone.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 180
A single daub of cream and it starts to caper around the room. You watch in
amazement as a previously inanimate object takes an exaggerated run-up, leaps
dramatically off the ground, and vanishes suddenly in mid air. Only a few wisps of white smoke, in a hazy "W" shape, mark the departure of the $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 181
Nothing happens. Maybe the cream's a dud. Maybe it isn't designed for this
particular application. Maybe you can intimidate the salesman into giving you
a full refund, if you get angry enough. Who knows for sure?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 182
There's no vanishing cream left in the pot, I'm afraid.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 183
Rubbing gooey purple cream on things is a very involved process, requiring your
total concentration. You have to be holding the pot of cream, at least, if you
expect to be successful.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 184
An Arabian Genie does NOT appear, whereupon you are NOT granted three wishes,
which you do NOT use to acquire fabulous riches, power over all people, and a
set of true non-stick frypans (in order of difficulty). What DOES happen is
that you rub some skin off your fingers, and stop before you ruin your nails.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 185
I think you may have to turn it on before you can cut things up with it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 186
You don't have the lightsabre, so you can't very well go around cutting things
up with it, can you?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 187
The extra three feet provided by the lightsabre is enough to reach the string
supporting the white sphere. You bring the blade around in an overly dramatic
sweeping motion, and there is a slight fizzling noise as it cuts the string.
Luckily, the sphere doesn't break when it hits the ground.
END_MESSAGE


MESSAGE 188
You swing the lightsabre at the Silver Guardsman in a broad, powerful movement,
and there is a crackling noise ("crackle") as the glowing blade cuts the
Guardsman in half. Strangely, it doesn't seem bothered by this. The piece with
the arms reaches for the piece with the legs, and with a fkzzt noise ("fkzzt")
the two halves seal seamlessly back together. It resumes its post by the door.
Luckily for you, the Guardsman doesn't seem to hold a grudge, though I don't
know why not. If somebody cut me in half I would.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 189
The plant sees the glowing sword in your hands, and rightly recognizes it as
a threat. It reaches out with its many runners and grabs you. Just as it is
about to push you into its gaping mouth, to be chewed up into lots of little
tiny bits, your opal ring glows a soft blue, giving you a second chance, and
you become momentarily intangible. You slip through the plant's runners and
take advantage of its confusion to escape to the north.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 190
The plant sees the glowing sword in your hands, and rightly recognizes it as
a threat. Hundreds of runners suddenly whip around you, and you are totally
immobilised. The lightsabre is torn from your grasp, and the plant then
proceeds to eat you, despite your assurances that you will become a strict
"meatetarian". This is one mean plant.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Plant Food.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 191
You grip the haft of the lightsabre tightly, and charge at the Wicked Witch.
She vanishes, reappearing instantly on the opposite side of the room.
 "You expect to hurt ME with that toy?" she sneers. She gestures, and with
a final "vvvwuuu", the glowing blade winks off.
END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 192
The lightsabre just doesn't cut it. But don't worry, even in the movies it
didn't cut the walls and things. It seems there's some things you can't cut
with a lightsabre, and the $noun$ is one of them.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 193
Pick something else to cut to shreds. That's a vital part of the game, and I'll not have you destroying it. Leave the $noun$ be!.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 194
I don't think it's really such a good idea to cut things to bits. What happens
if you need it later? (Besides, if you cut it up, you'll make my job just that
much more difficult. It's hard enough keeping track of all the things you do as
it is. So leave the $noun$ be, please.)
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 195
Putting Zorro to shame, you chop the $noun$ into smaller and smaller bits.
Finally, all that's left is a small pile of tiny and unrecognizable pieces
(which I am obliged to remove, since we can't have a messy playing area). They
are carried off by a group of ants who have been following you around, waiting
for just such an occasion as this. I hope that was fun. You have just destroyed
a perfectly good $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 196
You cut the $noun up into little pieces.
The now-useless bits are carried off in the traditional manner of all adventure
games (ie. I tell you about a writhing cloud of black smoke that has just
entered the room, and while you're distracted, I take the pieces away to add to
my collection). You have just destroyed a perfectly good $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 197
You slice it into a large number of tiny pieces, which are blown away by a wind
designed specifically to blow away tiny pieces of $noun$. Happy now?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 198
You don't seem to understand the requirements for cutting things. Let me
explain. Before you can cut things, you need something with a sharp edge, or
better yet, a blade. Try again, I'm sure you'll get the hang off it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 199
The Silver Guardsman stands immobile as you rain blows on its impervious metal
skin. The net result is a great collection of bruises for you, and a tremendous
amount of amusement for anybody watching.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 200
The plant isn't pleased with your attempt to kill it. It curls its runners
around your arms and legs and you are dragged, kicking and screaming, toward
its open mouth. I won't go into great detail; your ranking says it all.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Mulch.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 201
Uh huh, right. This woman is one of the most powerful Witches in existence, and
you're going to kill her, just like that? Come back to reality, my friend. You
think others haven't tried? You see that stuffed toad over there? The one with
the freckles? Well, that was the previous person who made an attempt to kill
the Wicked Witch of the West. And that pile of rotten eggs by the window? He
was the one before that. I think you should try another way.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 202
Please specify a victim.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 203
Your intended victim is not present.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 204
The pail is already full.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 205
You splash down the beach and fill the pail in the ocean. Suddenly, a huge wave
crashes in and rips the pail from your grasp. You can only watch as your bucket
floats off into the sunset. (Why did you want a bucket of salt water anyway?
Horrible stuff, that.)
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 206
You fill the pail from the waterfall.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 207
The aquarium is totally sealed, watertight. There's no way you could possibly
get any water out of it. Besides, the little fishies need it all.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 208
Read the writing on the pail, will you?! It's for water only!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 209
Try again, and tell me what you'd like to fill it with.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 210
You pour the water out of the pail and onto the ground, where it quickly
seeps away. What a waste!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 211
The pail is already empty.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 212
Empty is for liquid only. If you want to TAKE ALL FROM $NOUN$, say so.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 213
You can't fill the $noun$ with the $object$. I'm truly sorry.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 214
There's nothing you can take out of the $object$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 215
Look, there's six pages to this catalogue. You'll have to be more specific
about which page number you'd like to read. Okay?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 216

                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 1
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                        Makers Of Fine Magical Equipment

Spectacles Of See Invisible
  (Item #7765d) - a hot seller, this item. With these glasses, all things
  invisible are yours to view. Limit: one per customer.

Spectacles Of X-Ray
  (Item #4456a) - ever wanted to make like Superman and check the colour of
  other people's underwear? With this item, it's all possible.

Thinking Cap
  (Item #574) - improves your mental processes by 400%. Very popular.

Portable Hole
  (Item #3764e) - you've seen them in the cartoons, now get one for real. Just
  slap this little beauty on any wall, floor, or ceiling, and zappo! An instant
  passage you can climb straight through. Infinitely re-useable.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 217
                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 2
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                        Makers Of Fine Magical Equipment

Shrinking Machine
  (Item #64334c) - a robot arm that blends science and magic together. The
  science makes it look fantastic, and the magic makes it work.

Enchanted Armour
  (Item #6436) - to save you from werewolves, vampires, ghosts, and goblins,
  this armour is enchanted with 16 different spells of protection. Available in
  Silver, Gold, and Gleaming Black.

Vanishing Cream
  (Item #114c) - great for parties! Make the chairs come to life and disappear!
  Rub a little on the hostess and watch her clothes vamoose! Various methods of
  vanishing available.

Golden Amulet
  (Item #9984) - ideal item for any adventure. Carries a 12 month guarantee.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 218
                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 3
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                        Makers Of Fine Magical Equipment

Containment Cube
  (Item #1145d) - evildoers are fooled by the innocent facade, and then sucked
  in by the powerful containment void. A number of styles available, including
  Mirror, Painting, and Clock, to suit any decor.

Bronze Guardsman
  (Item #1278a) - for low level security operations, the Bronze Guardsman is
  just the thing. Tracks all evil persons within a four yard range.

Silver Guardsman
  (Item #1278b) - the Silver Guardsman has a scanning range of 30 yards, and
  keeps tabs on all moving objects right down to mouse size.

Golden Guardsman
  (Item #1278c) - the Golden Guardsman; premier security from GB, with a huge
  one mile scanning range, and the ability to track individual molecules.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 219
                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 4
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                        Makers Of Fine Magical Equipment

Magic Hand Crank
  (Item #78543) - tired of having to crank everything by hand? Our Magic Hand
  Crank is the answer, taking all the manual labour out of the job.

Black Belt
  (Item #7590) - instant proficiency in any martial art! Improves your own
  skill a hundredfold. Immensely popular.

Magic Finger & Refill Curses
  (Item # 752e) - incredible power at your fingertips. Just point and wham!
  Instant curse. Comes with three assorted curses. Re-useable.

  (Item 753a) - two dozen mild curses, for use with the Magic Finger.

Double Whammy
 (Item # 753b) - the most powerful curse available for the Magic Finger.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 220

                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 5
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                        Makers Of Fine Magical Equipment

Holeproof Door
  (Item #9537a) - portable holes pack up and go home when faced with this
  magical wonder. Available in a wide range of styles and colours.

Invisible Door
  (Item #9537b) - an extremely popular item. This month's best seller.

Mystery Object
  (Item #2471) - we know what it does, but we're not telling! Try it and
  find out for yourself. Satisfaction guaranteed.

Sphere Of Dispel Darkness
  (Item #4387c) - specifically designed to remove all traces of magically
  induced darkness, our sphere discharges in one brilliant flash.
  Note: caution is recommended in the use of this item.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 221
                 Gooseberry Brothers - Summer Catalogue, Page 6
             様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
                           +++ Special Movie Items +++

By special arrangement, Gooseberry Brothers is proud to be able to offer:

Lightsabre
  (Item #001) - the famous energy sword. Cuts through anything you can carry,
  and then some. Collectors' item!

Ruby Slippers
  (Item #002) - magical shoes with fantastic powers. All sizes, but
   unfortunately no choice of colour available.

Ordering Instructions
Prompt delivery is assured by our new Magicomputer 2000 (tm) order-handling
system. Simply type the word ORDER followed by the item number you wish to
receive, for example: ORDER #6436 would cause you to receive one suit of our
fine Enchanted Armour. Our Magicomputer (tm) will deal with your order the
instant it arrives. Please have your account number ready when ordering.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 222

There's no such page.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 223
You need to have a catalogue before you can order anything. You can't just go
around ordering things willy nilly, you know!
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 224
Please use a valid item number.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 225
I hope you have your account number handy (0 cancels).
END_MESSAGE
MESSAGE 226

A message slowly forms in large, glowing red letters that hang in the air:

           "INVALID ACCOUNT NUMBER - YOUR CATALOGUE HAS BEEN REVOKED"
                              Gooseberry Brothers

The catalogue suddenly disappears in a tiny puff of white smoke.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 227

Letters appear in the air before you, forming a glowing red sentence.

                    "TRANSACTION CANCELLED AT YOUR REQUEST"
                              Gooseberry Brothers
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 228

A message forms in glowing red letters, hanging in the air in front of you.

        "PURCHASE OF THAT ITEM IS RESTRICTED TO LENDING AUTHORITIES ONLY"
                              Gooseberry Brothers
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 229

Letters slowly appear in the air in front of you, glowing bright red.

          "YOUR ACCOUNT HAS INSUFFICIENT CREDIT TO FACILITATE PURCHASE"
                              Gooseberry Brothers
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 230

A message appears in large, glowing red letters in the air in front of you.

                         "SORRY, THAT ITEM IS SOLD OUT"
                              Gooseberry Brothers
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 231

A message appears in glowing red letters, filling the air in front of you.

                            "CURRENTLY OUT OF STOCK"
                              Gooseberry Brothers
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 232

There is a puff of blue smoke, and the $noun$ appears in the room.
A message in large, glowing red letters slowly forms in the air above it:

                        "THANK YOU FOR SHOPPING WITH US"
                              Gooseberry Brothers

You notice that the catalogue has quietly vanished into thin air whilst all
this is happening. Still, you got the $noun$.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 233
All the water splashes to the ground and trickles away as you attempt to carry
it without the aid of the pail. Twit.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 234
You unlatch the lid of the chest marked ~S Lived~ and are suddenly attacked by
a huge swarm of devil creatures. They unpack themselves from the chest with
lightning speed and surround you, grinning evilly. I won't go into details, but
it should be fairly obvious what happens next. And if it isn't, let me mention
the razor sharp claws these wee beasties have, and the amazingly pointy teeth
they seem to enjoy showing you. Get the picture? It seems that this S Lived
person didn't want his luggage tampered with.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Embarrassing.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 235
As you undo the lid, a fifteen foot daemon breaks all every spatial law by
leaping out of a three foot chest. He shouts "BOO!", and starts laughing in a
gravelly voice. The daemon points a razor sharp talon at you and says happily,
 "This'll teach you to touch other people's luggage!" You vanish in a burst of
light, leaving nothing behind but a very bad smell.

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Nonexistent.
END_MESSAGE 

MESSAGE 236
As you are about to open the chest, you opal ring glows a soft blue. It seems
that opening this particular chest would be mortally dangerous, and the ring
is giving you a warning, a second chance. How about choosing another chest?
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 237
Stay off it, okay? You'll leave dirty footprints all over the place.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 238
You're already standing up. (And it's a good thing too! You have work to do!)
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 239
You may be counting on the ring you are wearing to save you from your certain
death, to give you a second chance. However, this will not be the case. The
ring will save you from outside threat only, NOT from deliberate (and rather
stupid) acts of self destruction. Sorry.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 240
You hit the ground with a great deal of force. Further description should be
unnecessary. (I mentioned the sharp rocks already, didn't I? I thought so.)

                          **** You have died ****


Your ranking is Flatter Than A Pancake.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 241
A swirl of colour gathers in the air around you, momentarily cutting off your
view. There is a humming noise from the mystery object to accompany this
process. The colour quickly fades away, and you find yourself in another room.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 242
There is a high-pitched hum as you push the switch, and the air around you
fills with colour, obscuring the room from view. Then, just like cheap jeans,
the colours fade. You notice that everything you were carrying has somehow
found its way to the ground.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 243
You drop all your belongings on the beach and dive into the surf. You spend
some time swimming and splashing in the water, and come out feeling much
better. After drying off in the sun, you reclaim your things.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 244
You leave your belongings near the edge of the pool, to avoid ruining anything,
and jump into the pool.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 245
If you break it, you pay for it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 246
As you begin the walk into the centre of the city, you hear the flapping of
leathery wings from behind you. You turn in time to see the swarm of winged
monkeys start their dive toward you. They all appear quite weary. One of them
picks you up, and once again you are flying off to the Wicked Witch's Castle.
 "Sorry we're... puff... late," says the monkey carrying you. "Ethel (that's
the Wicked Witch to you) has had us flying errands from one end... puff... of
the country to the other. Get this from here...puff...  take that there.
Nothing but work, work, work!" Several of the other monkeys nod in agreement.
Eventually you arrive at the castle, where you are taken to the top of the
tower, as before, and dropped in the window.

END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 247
Suddenly a four foot egg with arms and legs rushes into the room. It's dressed
in a purple velvet waistcoat, with black shoes and knee high socks. It runs
around for a while clutching its head and screaming incoherently about the
cracks in its shell, proclaiming its hatred for all brick walls everywhere. It
also mentions something about the total incompetence of the equestrian mounts
and male employees of some obscure King. Finally, after bumping into the walls
a few times and cursing with words you didn't think eggs knew, it runs from the
room, still yelling.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 248
Suddenly, a hoard of tiny red imps, armed with pitchforks, appears in the room.
They swarm all over you, knock you to the ground, and begin kicking and
prodding you in a number of sensitive areas. Then, just as suddenly as they
appeared, the imps are gone. You get to your feet, rubbing the sore spots, and
only then do you realise that the imps have stolen some of your possessions.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 249
Just at that moment, a troupe of dwarves files into the room. They each have a
pick and a white beard, and are singing a song about going off to work, or
something. You count seven of them, all told. You can't understand why they are
all so happy about working, until the one on the end of the line drops a huge
diamond on the floor, and you realise just where they work. After marching
around for a while, singing, they wander out of the room again, leaving the
diamond behind. They don't seem at all concerned about it.
END_MESSAGE

MESSAGE 250
I'd like to take this opportunity to point out one of the advanced features of
this game. Now that you are aware that the portable hole can be used just like
any other exit, you'll probably want to climb through it often. To make this
process as painless as possible, the Function key F5 has been defined as "HOLE"
which is equivalent to typing "CLIMB THROUGH THE HOLE" or "STEP INTO THE HOLE",
or any of the many other valid variants. Of course, you can always type it out
in full if you're still wary of all this new-fangled technology, but it's nice
to know that F5 is there if you want it.

END_MESSAGE
